You Are Not Broken
You are in the messy middle.
Your body may be aching. Your mind might be overthinking. Your stress levels may be high. You are doing the best you can, yet it feels like not enough.
Am I broken? Will love always feel this hard? Is this just the way it is?
I know that feeling oh so well.
I realize now, I was never broken. I was transitioning. I was awakening.
I was remembering
We are taught very binary thinking.
All or Nothing.
This or That.
Man or Woman.
Yet life actually grows in the middle, the messy middle.
The emotional days. The days in the sun. The days you try a new thing. The days you hurt. The days you are unsure of life. The days you rock. The days that suck.
The messy middle is where living is. Discovering who you are.
Learning to just be.
And sometimes it’s hard to be present with the mess: when we feel unworthy, when we feel stuck, when we silence our needs.
I’m not a fan of these moments either. I want to be confident all the time, but that’s not real. Sometimes life is hard, and I am a hot mess, too. We are all going through something.
I’ve been struggling financially. I’ve ben in it, y’all. Learning to navigate running a business, paying bills, feeling through the feels, doing the inner healing work, feeling for my ancestors, taking care of my home, and showing up as a sister, partner, daughter, friend, and family member. There is so much.
Yet in this messy middle, I am doing the inner work so I can slowly get out of my own way.
I am not just living based on my own choices → but also the choices of my ancestors. I repeat their patterns, whether I realize it or not.
The messy middle is us learning to love ourselves. Saying loving things to our bodies when they hurt. Learning how to regulate our nervous systems so we can live more peaceful lives. Feeling for our inner child and reminding them it is safe to communicate their needs.
The healing work is hard. It is you, facing you, and the things we sometimes avoid. Like the problems with parents. Or the pain from the ex.
This is the messy middle.
It is you choosing to see the pain in your body.
For me, the messy middle was the moment I had to have a hard conversation with myself: “Hazel, I love that you are dedicated to helping people, and also, we need to get a job. We're struggling, bruh.”
I was drowning trying to start my business. The messy middle → right? Yikes.
This is so vulnerable for me, but here I am sharing my truth.
The messy middle is where the healing work lives. These spiritual girlies out here making it seem like you can manifest from one day to the next, and I’m not going to lie, at first I believed the hype. And yes, you can manifest.
But it takes work. It takes action. It takes investment in self. It takes asking for help.
I knew I wanted to get out of my money struggles. I see my future. I am financially free. I am supporting my family. I am able to help others. But this moment had to happen for me to shift.
I got called in by my family and my partner. Ugh, I was so deep in my shame. Yet they loved me and stood by me. I couldn’t have done it without them, especially my sister. I love her. She is my rock. She has really been helping me through my messy middle.
I lived in the shame, the guilt, the spiraling, the panic → over and over again. It is exhausting. It takes you to very low places.
But a calling in is always from love.
I asked for help. I got perspective. I went deeper into my prayer, meditation, and yoga. I started working with a healer to get to the roots of my money and unworthiness blocks. I’ve been doing the work for nine years, yet I knew there was something deeply rooted that was bigger than me.
I showed up for myself in so many ways. And now opportunities are coming left and right. I am feeling more confident and grounded. I am showing up with more love and compassion, for myself and others. I am communicating my needs. And I am so excited I am now working in several new spaces 😉 stay tuned.
I am sharing this with you because I know what it feels like to think you’re broken. You are trying your hardest, yet you feel like you are always behind. Not enough.
You don’t need to live there anymore.
You deserve to rest. You deserve to slow down. You deserve to remember: you are whole, just the way you are.
You are doing such a good job. I see you fam!
This is just the messy middle, and remember: it doesn’t last forever. And life is so much better when you are surrounded by people who love you.
This is the work I do with people because I’ve lived it, not just studied it.
If something inside felt activated as you read this piece, that’s not a coincidence. That’s your inner knowing telling you it’s time to heal those wounds that keep repeating. Here’s how we can walk this together:
🌿 Anahata Activation For the ones ready to open their heart again.
Sometimes the mess closes us off. We protect ourselves by going numb, staying small, keeping the walls up. This session is designed to gently open your heart.
Together, for a 1 hour virtual energy healing session, we will clear stuck and stagnant energy from the heart space, release the emotional blocks that have been keeping you small, channel your inner child or higher self, and reconnect you with the unstruck, unbroken love at your core.
You weren’t met to be closed off forever. You were just protecting yourself until it was safe. It’s safe now.
🔥 Sacred Shield Session For the ones who need protection → for themselves, their family, and their work.
It’s getting real out here. Sometimes you need more than good vibes → you need a sacred container that holds you.
This is a deep, intentional 90-minute virtual ceremony designed to clear what no longer belongs, seal your field with divine protection, and anchor safety into every layer of your life. This session covers your personal energy field, aura, and spirit, your family’s collective energy (up to 3 members), and your business (1), with energetic protection sealed into your work and mission.
You don’t have to carry it all unshielded. Let’s build the sacred shield together. Schedule a free call to learn more
✨ Self-Evolution Journey — 3 Month Container For the ones ready to go all the way in.
If you recognize yourself in the messy middle and you are ready to do the deep work to come out the other side → this is for you.
Over three months, we go to the roots. The patterns. The ancestors. The inner child. The blocks around money, love, worthiness, and purpose. This is not a quick fix. This is a full evolution, and I will be right there walking it with you.
There is something here for everyone. Just ask yourself what you really need right now, and trust that answer.
Schedule a free 30 minute call with me to see if this is in alignment for you.
Thank you for seeing me. Thank you for letting these words land. The fact that you read all the way to the end tells me something about you, you are ready. You are seeking. You are doing the work even when it’s hard.
That means everything to me. Truly.
I don’t take lightly the trust it takes to let someone into your healing journey. I am honored to be even a small part of yours.
Sending you so much love, so many blessings, and deep gratitude for being part of my growth and evolution, too.
We heal together. 🤍
Con Mucho Amor, Hazel Montserrat